Home > Dom’s Deep Thoughts – The Happiness Factor

Dom’s Deep Thoughts – The Happiness Factor

A lot of good things have been happening in all aspects of my life lately, and I sit back and think to myself: “Wow. Life is good. Really, really good.” 

My little sisters are doing amazingly well, and we shared a ton of laughs this weekend when Erika visited Ottawa. I look back on happy dinners, walks around downtown and giggling like lunatics during our Saturday night Golden Girls marathon and it warms my heart. My other sister Alice is about to embark on an exciting life change (more to come of that later) and as a proud and bossy big sister, I’m really happy for her (really, just happy that she took my sisterly advice – haha).  The hubby is excelling at a job he loves, I’m surrounded by wonderful friends, and I’ve recently landed a new full-time job that is both fulfilling and interesting (they do exist!). Right now, I’m just so thankful to be “Dominique”.

Dom's Deep Thoughts - The Happiness Factor | www.styledomination.com
“Be happy with who you are…unless you’re a serial killer.” – Ellen DeGeneres

Over the weekend, I had coffee with a fellow blogger who I have admired for years – from a distance. She’s so cool, so put together…I’d look at her photos and wonder what her secret was…if she was scary in real life like other bloggers I’ve met. When she contacted me to grab a coffee, a little part of me felt like I was going for coffee with a celebrity. While part of me was nervous, I was also super excited to learn what made this stylish girl tick. Well, I was floored and thrilled to learn that she was a little bit of a nerd like me, in the same spot in life, was easy to laugh and incredibly easy going. It was refreshing and meeting this girl and getting to know her really cemented the notion that good attracts good. Not that all of this good is about me, but thankfully, I don’t meet a lot of weirdos!

Dom's Deep Thoughts - The Happiness Factor | www.styledomination.com

While barreling to work in my car, cursing the slow-as-hell dump truck in front of me, mind-racing with all the stuff I needed to get done before lunch, a homeless person at the side of the road caught my eye. He was walking along with a beautiful, well-taken-cared-for dog and he and the dog were skipping along happily. He was laughing while patting the dog’s head and looking like he was having a blast. And here I was, driving my expensive piece of machinery to my well-paying job, that pays for my nice house, nice clothes, nice vacations and food on the table every day…being a brat because I was stuck behind a slow moving vehicle. I tell ya – he put things into perspective real fast.

All of this to say that I don’t take any of this goodness for granted as much as I used to. I want to keep fostering positivity, meeting like-minded individuals I can learn from, and glean more from not comparing myself to others and learning to love the skin I’m in.


Five tips that keep me happy and in check? Read on:

  1. I know this may sound crazy (I need to STOP starting sentences with that), but I write down compliments that really hit home. Someone once told me that I had the greatest laugh. It meant a lot…and stopped worrying about my trademark hyena laugh/wail. Every now and then when I’m feeling low, I’ll pull out that list and give myself a little boost.
  2. I look out at the driveway at my car. It is the most expensive thing I’ve purchased. It’s not the cost that matters, it’s a symbol of two years of hard work and saving that I thought I’d never be able to do. THAT puts a smile on my face.
  3. I hang out with people I like, and outright avoid the miserable. I’m a good judge of character and I have a memory that doesn’t allow me to forget the negative. I gravitate towards positive happy people who make life fun. Life is too short to waste on perpetual negatrons.
  4. I look back at how far I’ve come. Life was a little rough growing up and I’m proud of the people that myself and my sisters turned out to be. We are all incredibly hard workers and made great lives for ourselves. We had strong support systems to guide us through life, and I’m so proud of the decisions we’ve made that have secured us great livings.
  5. I make time for things and people that matter to me. I take time to screw around in the garden, to workout, to kiss and feel up my husband (naughty), to laugh with my sisters, to goof off with my glamourous besties, to write, to cook, to pet the neighbours dog…these little things mean so much to cultivate happiness!

I invite you all to share with me what keeps you going. What makes you happy? What puts a smile on your face? How do you keep yourself in check and live your best life? Comments are open!

*Graphic courtesy of www.thetig.com

Dominique Baker
Dominique Baker

Dominique is a Canadian-based fashion and beauty influencer with a strong voice in Ottawa’s black community. Since launching her blog Style Domination in 2015, she has amassed a global fanbase. Dominique shares her life through beautiful imagery and compelling story-telling that speaks to her fans on a personal level. She’s been featured in The Guardian, Flare, The Kit and Cityline. She also hosts events for Dress for Success, the Gem Conference, and has been named a United Way Person 2 Know for the past three years.

Find me on: Web | Instagram


  1. September 22, 2016 / 2:55 pm

    I absolutely love this post Dom! All five observations are wonderful but number three rings so true for me – this is something I have struggled with but your post has really put this in perspective – we don’t need to be apologetic about wanting to surround ourselves with positive people who bring out the best in us! Keep the deep thoughts coming!

    • Dominique
      September 22, 2016 / 3:20 pm

      Thanks so much, Lindsay! Means a lot! I’ve worked hard to stop feeling bad about feeling good. The first step was kicking negatrons to the curb. Harsh, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do!

  2. September 23, 2016 / 4:35 pm

    Really great read! You seem like such a happy and fun woman to be around! I often see things like the homeless person you reacted to and it puts things back in perspective for me too. I think when people stop seeing the everyday things, that’s when we as humans get into trouble with not truly being happy with ourselves and what we have in our lives.

    • Dominique
      September 26, 2016 / 8:53 am

      Exactly, Jayci. Everyday, I remind myself to be so thankful to have a job, my health, my family and friends. There are so many people out there with less than us who are so happy and make it work. Can’t thank you enough for reading my post. Means a lot!

  3. September 23, 2016 / 4:36 pm

    Love this post! It’s my first time to your blog and I just had to say that you have such an inviting and friendly tone. Can’t wait to read more!

    • Dominique
      September 25, 2016 / 11:40 pm

      Wow! Thank you so much, Lisa! Your comments mean a lot!

  4. Rocio Chavez
    September 23, 2016 / 10:41 pm

    Yes, yes, yes – as we create our own life, we decide our happiness level too. Love this!

    • Dominique
      September 26, 2016 / 8:51 am

      Awww! Thank you, Rocio! I agree completely.

  5. September 28, 2016 / 5:02 pm

    Your list is so true…and sometimes things we often forget to cherish. Just this week I had to take a vow to stay off my actual Facebook feed because of all the negativity going on over there. It was literally draining me even though nothing was directly targeted towards me. I also like your suggestion to take a look at the one thing you worked hard for and got to remind yourself that it will all come in due time. Beautiful post and I am glad I am not the only one that has an admired blogger list lol!

    • Dominique
      September 28, 2016 / 9:47 pm

      Marie – thank you so much for your thoughtful comments! I hear you about Facebook. When I was about to give up on it, I found the “unfollow” button. It’s fantastic. I unfollowed everyone who annoyed me, and Facebook is now a much better place. Anyways, again, I greatly appreciate you taking the time to read my blog and comment. Wishing you a great day! xo

  6. yoelys
    October 4, 2016 / 4:48 pm

    I love this post Dominique, you have a fan in Jamaica 🙂
    I have been going through some hard times lately but I still have to be grateful for sooo many things. This post is just another reminder, that no matter how hard life is, there is always someone out there who has it worst. Thanks again. You are my big sister in my head, lol.

    • Dominique
      October 4, 2016 / 8:30 pm

      Wow – your lovely comment put a smile on my face! I’m so thrilled to be your Canadian big sister! LOL! It’s so true. Every day I wake up and thank God that I have a warm house to live in, food to eat, a job to go to and family to love and friends to hang with. So many people have it worse off than we do. Sometimes we need to check ourselves every now and then. Take care and don’t be a stranger!!

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