When I got serious about taking care of my relaxed hair, I saw growth that I didn’t think I could ever achieve. Gone were the days of dry, dull and lifeless hair. With trial and error, I found a bunch of products and hair care tricks that helped my relaxed hair thrive.
Of course, with trial and error comes setbacks. I want to share these relaxer no-nos with you so that you can put yourselves on the road to healthy, relaxed hair success. So, here is my list of the worst things you can do to your relaxed hair. Avoid them and you’ll start to see some real gains!
Abusing Heat Tools
Using heated styling tools on your hair regularly is detrimental to its health. Direct heat from curling irons/flat irons/blow dryers saps the hair of moisture and hydration, leading to dry, damaged hair. It is also the main cause of excess breakage (those short, broken pieces of hair you’ll see all over your clothing when you wear your hair out).
Not Deep Conditioning Your Hair
Deep conditioners and hair masks are concentrated conditioners that you apply to your hair after washing. They infuse hair with moisture, bringing it back to life, along with shine and better manageability.
When I started deep conditioning my hair weekly, the breakage stopped. Pro tip: coat your damp hair with deep conditioner and leave on for 30 minutes to an hour. Go one step further and wrap your hair with cling wrap or a plastic bag. This creates a bit of heat which causes the deep conditioner to penetrate hair even further.
Saying No To Protective Styling
Protective hairstyles are styles where your ends are tucked in. These hairstyles require minimal styling and keep your hair from getting dried out.
Protecting your ends is very important as they are the oldest and most fragile part of the hair. Everything we do to our hair eventually weakens the ends. Wearing your hair off your shoulders, away from brushing up against clothing or getting blown around in the elements will result in more consistent growth.
Examples of protective styles are buns, updos, twists, braids, wigs, etc. Not only are protective styles incredibly beneficial for your hair, they are great for changing up your regular look.
Too Many Hair Treatments At Once
The relaxer process is a tough one on hair. The treatment itself breaks down the disulfide bonds in hair therefore permanently straightening it. If you care for your relaxed hair well, this treatment is fine, but once you start permanently colouring and/or bleaching your hair, that’s a double whammy that even the strongest of hair does not take to well.
If you want to colour your hair, try semi-permanent dyes that are much gentler on your strands. Consult with a hairstylist you trust who can guide you on whether or not colouring is right for your relaxed hair. And lovelies, I’m afraid bleaching your relaxed hair is out if you want to keep the hair on your head.
Not Wrapping Your Hair Before Bed
Wrapping your hair at night in a silk or satin scarf protects your hair from the friction of tossing and turning while you sleep, which can lead to breakage. Furthermore, cotton pillowcases can suck the moisture out of your hair leaving it feeling dried out and brittle.
When you wrap your hair, it also keeps lint from sticking to your tresses. You can also use a satin or silk pillowcase, but I really love wrapping my hair in a scarf as it protects from both friction and loss of moisture. A silky pillowcase does protect your facial skin too, a lovely added bonus!
Not Seeing The Value In Moisturizing and Sealing
Moisturizing your hair with a water-based hydrator and following up with sealing your ends with a good oil is the key to healthy hair. Trust me! When I adopted this hydrating method, my hair bounced back faster than anything else.
This two-step process locks in moisture, bringing back strength and glossiness to neglected hair. A moisturizing lotion, spray or leave-in conditioner is applied to the length of your hair, followed up by applying a little oil to your ends (last two-three inches of hair).
Moisturizing and sealing is best done at night before bedtime. This gives the product a chance to work its magic without having to fight evaporation and manipulation that occurs during the day.
Opt for a moisturizer that is free of harmful ingredients like mineral oil and petroleum/pertrolatum. And again, a water-based moisturizer is best, because water is the best hydrator and most easily absorbed by hair (water should be listed as the first ingredient in the products list of ingredients).
Some of my favourite moisturizers are:
- Luster’s S-Curl No-Drip Activator Moisturizer
- Creme of Nature Creamy Oil Moisturizing Lotion with Argan Oil
- Shea Moisture Jamaican Black Castor Oil Strengthen & Restore Leave-In Conditioner
As for oils, try to find oils that have been cold-pressed. Cold-pressed oils have been derived from a more gentle, heat-free process, therefore retaining all of the great properties of the oil.
Some of my favourite oils are:
- Argan oil
- Jojoba oil
- Coconut oil
- Almond oil
You may use heavier oils to seal your hair such as shea butter and castor oil, but mix them with lighter oils such as olive oil. This will prevent your hair from feeling overly greasy or weighed down.
Abusing Protein Treatments
Routine protein treatments are wonderful for boosting the strength of your hair. Use them too frequently though and you will end up with crunchy, brittle, dry hair.
Over the past couple of years, I have noticed that so many more hair products contain protein. If you’re not carefully reading the ingredient list of your hair products, you can end up overloading your hair.
I suffered this exact problem. I was using shampoo, conditioner, deep conditioner and a leave-in treatment that each contained protein. Protein overload soon occurred and I my hair felt terrible. Once I discovered the problem and went back to basics, my hair recovered, but it took months.
Protein can sometimes be difficult to find in a product’s ingredient list. The following list are some common protein ingredients found in hair products:
- Keratin
- Hydrolyzed keratin
- Hydrolyzed silk or wheat protein
- Hydrolyzed collagen
Trying Too Many Products
When you find products that work for you, stick with them! Having a core set of hair products that you can rely on is a must for the happiness of your hair.
As a beauty blogger, I sometimes find this really hard to do. When I started paying close attention to a product’s ingredient list and looking out for things that don’t agree with my hair (mineral oils, sulphates, too much protein, etc.), it helped me decide whether or not a product is worth trying.
I cannot stress the importance of sticking to a hair product regimen that you know works for your hair. Don’t mess with it too much!
Other Things That Are Bad For Relaxed Hair
- Not using a wide-tooth comb to detangle your hair
- Brushing or combing your hair while it’s wet
- Not using a heat protectant before using heated styling tools
- Flat ironing wet hair
- Using heat tools on hair that you’ve applied oil too (it’s like deep-frying your hair)
- Blow-drying soaking wet hair
- Not air-drying your hair
I hope this list helps you! Once you stop these bad habits and stick to a healthy hair regimen, you will start to see positive results faster than you think.
Dominique is a Canadian-based fashion and beauty influencer with a strong voice in Ottawa’s black community. Since launching her blog Style Domination in 2015, she has amassed a global fanbase. Dominique shares her life through beautiful imagery and compelling story-telling that speaks to her fans on a personal level. She’s been featured in The Guardian, Flare, The Kit and Cityline. She also hosts events for Dress for Success, the Gem Conference, and has been named a United Way Person 2 Know for the past three years.
These tips are a MUST for all haircare journey.
Especially, deep conditioning. It’s a game changer. Thanks😊
Author
Thanks, Dorcas! I swear, deep conditioning changed my hair for the better completely. The other thing that I started doing just recently that has made a true positive difference is moisturizing and sealing. I’m shocked at how much softer and glossier my hair feels after routine moisturizing and sealing.
Hey Lady!
Taking some time to respond and let you know I am still following your tips and “doings” 🙂 I enjoy them because more often than not, your tips and information is something I had been doing for a while, got away from and/or started trying and they always work for me. I am a slave to the Joico “blue bottles” is what I call them. When you first presented this line, I tried it and have never looked back so thank you!!
On protective styles, I wore a wig for a few days on and off and back on and I noticed my ends were thinning big time so ladies, be careful with the wigs with combs to hold down the hair, use bobby pins or use the combs very very lightly around the edges. I am currently using Black Jamaican Castor oil for my ends and they are coming back to life. Other than that, my relaxed hair is doing really well.
Author
Hi Cheryl! There you are, girl! I’ve missed you! I’m so glad you are using the “blue bottles” Hahaha! I’m going to start calling them that. Also glad that the tips are working for you! And I hear ya about the wigs. A company sent me one that was so long and heavy (it was gorgeous!), but it really hurt! The combs would pull on my edges so bad. I started keeping the wig in place with a hat instead, until the whole damn thing blew off while crossing the street during a photoshoot in Montreal. Needless to say, the wig went in the trash.
I just completed my first deep conditioner . I used tgin hair miracle hair mask because I have thin relaxed hair. I love watching your utube video and I have learn a lot. I am beginning this relaxed hair journey looking for great results. Thanks for all your help
Thanks. Glad you took the time to research and look into how to look after relax hair. I have been relaxing for years and never really knew how to look after it. This was very helpful.
Thanks for the information. I suffer from products over load.
Author
You’re welcome. I think we all do!
Hi I am new to this. I just began my healthy hair journey and was looking for some useful tips to help. I have never taken the time to take care of my hair. Over the years I never did deep conditioning or silk wraps. I am embarrassed to say my hair has been neglected for too many years. Your tips sound realistic and doable. I will surely put them into practice. Thank you
Author
Hi Glenda! So glad you found my blog! Two things you should start with is weekly deep conditioning and wrapping your hair at night. Moisturizing and sealing did wonders for my hair as well. Lastly, don’t overdo it with protein-based products (protein is now in everything). When I cut it out of my hair routine, my hair started to thrive. That being said, a good protein treatment is excellent for hair every 6-8 weeks (Nexus Keraphix, Joico LustreLock Treatment and Aphogee 2-Step Protein Treatment are really good). Good luck! Stay in touch and let me know how it goes!
Oh gosh me too. You live and learn hun.
Great info. Thanks for sharing. I was diagnosed with Hypothyroidism several years ago and my hair is a mess. I try so hard but it is tough trying to keep hair on my head. My hair broke bad when I had it natural so I relaxed it softly aka texlaxed. It doesn’t break as much but it still breaks a lot. I am committed to working with my hair. I appreciate all your advice. Be blessed.
Author
Hi Dorothy! Thanks for reading! I am sorry to hear about your hypothyroidism diagnosis. Did your doctors recommend anything for your hair? Can you take any supplements geared towards growing healthy hair? I think texlaxing is a good idea!
Hii am asking about using mix flowers protein or protein and keratin in general. Because i tryed the chemical relaxers and i can say that i totally lost my hair, and now after i grow it back am scared to loosing it again.
Author
Oooh. Fair enough. Glad that you found something that works better for you. So sorry about your past experience with relaxers. Did you visit a doctor?
So how do I air dry straight?
Author
You know what, Paula? I’m going to write a blog post about this today. I will post in my Facebook group. Hang tight.
Hi I am going back to my roots literally and figuratively and go back to what I know works best for my hai as I’ve had a set back using a keratin product daily on my hair recently. My hair is as strong thriving and growing until I found what I thought was a “miracle” and damaged my hair. I look back at pics and see the change. I came upon your blog and you dated what I already know but I went for it. I am going back to my original regiment. Thanks
Hi. Thank you for the great tips. What do you say to doing an overnight hair mask?
Hi Dom,
I cut my hair about a year ago.
But I want to begin my hair journey again.. what deep conditioner do you prescribe.
Author
Hi Precious! I really like Joico K-Pak Lustrelock Treatment. I use this once a month. You only have to leave it on your hair for 3-5 minutes. Does a wonderful job of softening your hair and boosting its overall health. I am also a big fan of Aussie 3-Minute Miracle. I cover my hair with it, then wrap my hair in a plastic bag, and add heat with a heat cap. I keep the heat cap on for 20 minutes, then rinse out, airdry and style as per usual. Hope that helps! xo
Is it advisable to do a protein treatment a week or 2 before a relaxer? Does it make any difference or its better to get a relaxer and do a treatment post relaxer?
Author
Hi! I usually do them a week after a relaxer. That has really helped keep my hair strong and reduce breakage.
Is it advisable to do a protein treatment a week or 2 before a relaxer? Does it make any difference or its better to get a relaxer and do a treatment post relaxer?
Helpful info, thanks alot.
Started my relaxed hair regime 3 weeks ago and I was looking for the information on what to put in my relaxed hair after a wash, and I got the answer from you, 🙏
Hi Dominique please how is protein treatment done? and you recommend a perfect hair cream for my hair, please not too costly oo🤣🤣
Hi Dominique,
Can you please address roller setting? Is it good for your hair or not?
is every six weeks too often to relax your hair?also how do i make my hair feel softer and less hay like 😭
Author
Hi Layla! Yes – every six weeks is too often. It should be done every 8 weeks or more. You don’t want to overprices your already relaxed hair! You need to grow the natural hair out enough to have enough to relax without overlapping onto already relaxed hair.
As for the “hay hair” problem, try clarifying your hair with a clarifying shampoo to strip out any product. Then deep condition with a thick hair mask. Leave that in for 15-20 minutes. Want to boost the deep conditioning? Get yourself a heat cap from Amazon or your beauty supply store, wrap your conditioner-covered hair in a plastic bag and then put on the heat cap. Leave that on for 15-20 minutes, and then rinse out the mask. Spray leave-in conditioner into your hair and then add some hair oil or almond oil to your hair. Put your hair up in a heatless style like a bun. Moisturize your hair every other day until wash day…and repeat. The key hair is keeping heat off your hair to give it a break. Try that…but I would really need to know what your daily haircare routine is.
I hope this helps!