The natural hair movement has taken over the world and positively changed the narrative within the black hair industry. Gaining speed and popularity, black women are choosing to let their hair do its own thing to gorgeous results.
There are still a few of us out there who relax their hair for whatever reason. After years of trial and error, I’ve finally learned how to care for my own relaxed hair resulting in over 8 inches of growth in the past four years alone.
Chemical relaxers are treatments that permanently or semi-permanently straighten hair. Many women still choose to relax the natural haircare regime doesn’t work everybody due to the increased daily maintenance, issues with frizz, etc.
Those who relax think that this process will lead to an easy and carefree hair routine. WRONG. Hard work and dedication are required to keep your relaxed hair healthy and strong.
I have a YouTube channel where many videos are dedicated to relaxed hair health. Check it out here: http://www.youtube.com/c/styledomination. In the meantime, I’m going to share with you a few helpful tips to keep your hair luscious and healthy throughout the relaxer process.
Understand The Process
When you undertake any sort of chemical treatment for the hair, it’s now compromised and more prone to damage. Learn how to care for your hair, including what products will keep it healthy and hydrated. Also, if you are uncertain of how to relax hair, find yourself a great, knowledgeable hairstylist to do it for you. He or she can also educate you on how to maintain healthy, relaxed hair.
A Consistent Relaxing Schedule
Once you relax your hair, it is ideal to relax new growth every 8-10 weeks. Wait too long and hair can start breaking at the line of demarcation (where new growth meets old growth). Relax too soon and you run the risk of overprocessing your hair.
Embrace Texture
You don’t have to go bone straight when you relax your hair, in fact, keeping some texture strengthens your hair. You will also notice better growth due to increased hair health when you refrain from going to straight.
Relaxers were always intended to simply “relax” the hair to make it easier to style and maintain, not beat it into straight submission. My wonderful hairstylist only keeps the relaxer on my hair for a few minutes, allowing me to achieve more manageable hair. Bone straight hair isn’t better hair.
Love Your Scalp
If you have a dry, itchy scalp, moisturize it with a little oil. Also, cleanse it regularly. Healthy hair cannot grow out of an unhealthy scalp, and a clean scalp is conducive to good hair growth. If you suspect you may have a health issue leading to scalp dryness, visit your doctor.
Also, massage your scalp. This leads to increased blood circulation which nourishes your hair follicles making them nice and happy.
Trim Those Dead Ends
If your ends are weak, dried out and thin, chop them off. Stop focusing so much on length. What is the point of long hair if it’s dead?
Trim off the damaged ends and start focusing on your hair’s health instead. And people…if you choose to trim your hair yourself, use shears made for hair, not kitchen scissors! Hair shears are balanced properly and extra sharp, allowing for haircuts that are precise without shredding your strands.
Wash Your Hair Regularly
I’m always shocked when I meet people who rarely wash their hair or wash monthly. It’s true that this can work for some people, but for most, it doesn’t. You cannot expect to grow healthy hair if you do not care for it. Regular washing rids the hair of excess oil, sebum and hair products.
Hair products must be washed from hair because they can eventually lead to dryness, especially those that are alcohol or silicone-based.
Hair definitely sheds and breaks less when it’s clean, so find a schedule that works well for you. I wash my hair weekly and that works really well for me.
Deep Conditioner Is Your Best Friend
I have been relaxing my hair since I was 15 years old. It was only a few years ago that I discovered that a weekly deep conditioning treatment was CRUCIAL to my hair’s health.
My hair was always a little dry and suffered from a lot of shedding. The shedding made retaining length virtually impossible. I was stuck with hair just a little past shoulder length for years.
When I incorporated deep conditioning into my hair routine (I wash my hair weekly, always deep conditioning afterwards), my hair thrived.
I asked my hairstylist to recommend a great deep conditioner and she suggested Schwarzkopf Bonacure Repair Rescue Treatment. This has been a lifesaver for me. My hair started to flourish, and I gained six inches of new growth in a year. In addition, my hair became really shiny and soft. It was so much easier to manage thanks to routine deep conditioning.
Moisturize Daily
Mositurizing my hair daily is the other hair care tip I implemented that saved my hair. My ends were dry, split and thin. I got a good trim (also crucial to hair health), and started applying a little coconut oil to the ends of my hair on a nightly basis. This greatly assisted with retaining length!
Just be careful with the oils! Do not aply oils to your hair then use heat tools. Oils + Heat = Fried Hair.
Minimize Manipulation
No more combing your hair like a maniac. No more brushing your hair while wet and girls…stop twirling your hair around your fingers.
All of these things lead to breakage and split ends. The same goes for using rubber bands for ponytails and too tight hair elastics.
Protective Hairstyles
OK – take one look at my Instagram or blog and you’ll see me with my hair down all of the time. In actuality, my hair is always up with my ends tucked away in a bun. This protects my hair from the friction of rubbing against coat collars, scarves, etc. which causes breakage.
Wigs, weaves, twists, bantu knots and other protective styles save your hair. Wigs are fun too, allowing you to test out new looks and hair colours. Weaves, if done properly, protect your hair allowing it to grow.
I also like to keep my hair covered from the rain and cold (I truly believe cold, dry weather is detrimental to hair health).
Good Hair Tools
Arm yourself with a wide tooth comb which is great for detangling hair with little manipulation. If you use heat hair tools such as curling irons and flat irons, choose ceramic versions as they are more protective of hair. Oh yeah – arm yourself with a good heat protectant too. These products protect your and minimize heat damage.
Don’t keep your hair tools for years and years either. Combs can get knicks that pull and break hair, along with old, worn out hair brushes. The same goes for the above-mentioned heat tools.
Protein Treatments
Protein treatments are great for restoring hydration and keratin to your hair. Try using a protein treatment each time you use heat tools on your hair (these treatments can be in the form of Olaplex, keratin-based deep conditioners, or even coconut oil treatments).
If you already have healthy hair, protein treatments are still advised. I use a protein treatment monthly to repair any damage from heat tools and styling.
That being said, if you hair is very dry, I would stay away from protein as it can make it feel worse. Don’t overdo protein treatments either as they can leave your hair feeling dry and stiff.
Conclusion
If you are struggling with your relaxed hair, seek help! If you feel you have a scalp issue, visit your doctor to determine if there is indeed a problem. Don’t forget to that healthy hair starts from the inside out, so eat well, drink a ton of water, and don’t forget those vitamins!
If you have any questions, please feel free to email me at styledomination@gmail.com. I’m here to help…
Dominique is a Canadian-based fashion and beauty influencer with a strong voice in Ottawa’s black community. Since launching her blog Style Domination in 2015, she has amassed a global fanbase. Dominique shares her life through beautiful imagery and compelling story-telling that speaks to her fans on a personal level. She’s been featured in The Guardian, Flare, The Kit and Cityline. She also hosts events for Dress for Success, the Gem Conference, and has been named a United Way Person 2 Know for the past three years.
I wish I had this info 5 years ago. Great tips.
Author
I get comments like this all of the time. I also wish I knew what I was doing when I first relaxed my hair. It would be so much longer! LOL! Thanks for reading, Sandy!
How often should one perm their hair?
Author
I like to relax my hair every eight weeks. This works for me as stretching often breaks my hair. Every person is different though – listen to y9ur hair. It will tell you what it likes and doesn’t like! A good rule of thumb is ensuring that you have at least one inch of new growth to relax.
I agree with everything said here! I’ve worn my hair relaxed for decades and have had breakage seasons but I learned to bounce back from this by using oils and very little to no manipulation to my hair. After seeing a professional stylist 2 to 3 years ago, my hair began to break, thin and become way to silky straight with each visit. I stopped going and worked hard on getting my hair BACK to my back over the last 2 years. It is amazing the results so unfortunately, I do not trust stylists who do not follow instructions and do what they think it best for my hair. Not every “great treatment” works on all hair types. I learned that the hard way. Now, I have healthy long hair that still isn’t wear it used to be in length but I focus more on health rather than growth and it just started to grow back nicely.
Thank you Dominique!!
Author
Hi Cheryl! Jeez – I’m so sorry that happened. I am hearing so many nightmare stories from people “abused” by stylists. I’m glad you found a routine that works for you. I find that deep conditioning and no heat works wonders for my hair. I like to mess with my hair too (playing with it, twirling it, etc), and when I learned to stop that bad habit, my hair started growing in places that it refused to before. Anyways, as always, thanks for reading!! xoxoxo
I recently started a new hair journey with a big chop. You have been very inspirational in that journey. A lot of these tips I wasn’t aware of until I started watching videos like yours on YouTube. I still feel very confused about my hair as to what works and what doesn’t, what’s necessary and what isn’t but I am learning. I know persons have been suggesting stretching relaxers for more than 6 six weeks but after the 6 week mark my hair starts breaking off (like now) with one side of my hair dryer, shorter etc than the other side. I am trying to stretch to 8 weeks (I am 7 wks post), deep conditioning every week, moisturizing and sealing, applying no heat and all that good stuff but it still breaks. Love my hair when it was relaxed and healthy so I am fighting to get back to that point. Not ready to give up
Author
Jai – I’m honoured that I can inspire you. Thank you so much. Kind comments like these keep me going everyday.
Sounds like you are doing great so far on your new journey! My hair looks a little crazy and definitely feels drier leading up to a relaxer. I myself, am still trying to find out exactly what works for me. I have a pretty good arsenal of products right now but I definitely notice that deep conditioning and keeping heat out of my hair keeps it really happy. I’m not a fan of stretching. Once, I stretched to about 13 weeks and while I gained some growth, my hair was totally unmanageable and detangling it was a nightmare. No thanks! Thanks so much for reading, Jai. Please stay in touch! xoxoxo
My hair is dry and even dryer in the winter time. I have a relaxer. I started experiencing too much breakage. While washing my hair, I would see tiny chips of hair in the sink. I don’t use a lot of products on my hair. Keracare to wash/deep condition (under a dryer), leave in conditioner to detangle and Chi serum to flat iron. Near end of week, I wear my hair up. I started using a hair lotion (soft n beautiful) and sealed with an oil or oil product. Thats when I started noticing the constant tiny bits of hair in the sink. It took me a couple of washes to eliminate what could be causing the breakage. I stopped using the hair lotion and the tiny chips of breakage stopped. My hair looked moisterized, but the product was actually drying it out.
Author
Hi! I’m so sorry this happened to your poor hair! Some of these products are so loaded with silicones and other naughty products that they have the complete opposite effect of what they promise. At least you were able to pinpoint the culprit and take some corrective action! Good for you! xo
The same thing happened to me when I began to use the Indigo Lustre Glo about two weeks ago. You raved about it on your YouTube channel. So, I decided to give it a try. The first time I used it, which was about three weeks ago now, I noticed more breakage than I wanted to see and was accustomed to seeing. That wash day, I used it to flat iron my hair, and then later that evening, I used it to prep my hair for bed. Perhaps that additional application during my nighttime prep was too much. I then didn’t use it for several days. I still noticed some continued breakage, i. e. mid-shaft pieces. I then used the cream the following week, but focused more on my ends. Oddly enough, my ends aren’t coming out, but, I continue to see some mid-shaft breakage.
My hair apparently doesn’t like the Indigo Lustre Glo product! I normally don’t use anything on my hair as moisture maintenance between weekly cleansing/deep conditioning and styling. Even when I was blow drying and flat ironing weekly, which I had done for three years, my hair didn’t need any additional lubricants, and wasn’t experiencing this level of breakage. So, the only thing I can attribute the breakage to is the Indigo Lustre Glo. The good news is that the hair of my Dear Dad and Dear Brother seems to be responding well to it. The thing about Indigo Luster Glo is that it leaves a nice shine, and, the hair looks and feels moisturized. But, this isn’t going to be the product for me.
By the way: I noticed, Dominique, that you did not mention Indigo Lustre Glo Moisturizng Cream in your May 2020 post. Did you find that it was causing breakage for you as well?
Great article with beautiful pictures included! Thanks for the info!
Author
Thank you kindly, Kim!!
Thanks for the tips, by watching your videos and applying your regimen I have noticed great change in my hair.
Author
I’m thrilled, Sandra! So glad my tips are working for you!
I wish I knew this way before my hair journey …I got to know about how essential deep Conditioning is for our relaxed hair a year ago but I got to be consistent some months ago. In our part of the world (Africa, Ghana) even our hairstylists do not know how important it is and when you take along your deep conditioner to the salons every week to wash your hair, they will just tell you not to deep condition often and it is only necessary when you notice breakage. And even with that there are only a few salons that have good deep conditioners almost 90% of them use one brand.
Author
Oh no!! Jeez. You know, you are paying the stylist….I don’t understand why they don’t do what you ask for!! Clearly, they don’t understand healthy hair. I’m glad that you are learning what works for you. Thank you so much for reading my blog and watching my videos. Please stay in touch!
Hi, I just found your YouTube and blog pages!! Wow what a “God send!” I just relaxed my hair after being natural for 12 years. I want to make sure I am doing everything right to maintain healthy strong hair!!
How soon after a relaxer do you shampoo?
Author
Hi Miriam! Wow! How are you adjusting to your newly relaxed hair? Are you enjoying it? I hope so! You should wait at least one week after relaxing to shampoo your hair. Don’t forget to deep condition! Thanks so much for watching and following along. Means the world!
Dom
How often do you straighten your hair? And how/where do you get it straightened? I have relaxed hair and I straighten once a week and my hair looks healthy but I feel like it’s really damaged. I don’t know what to do at this point and I also don’t want to go natural.
Author
Hi Christina! I relax my hair once every 8-12 weeks. Usually, every 10 weeks. I go to Hairworld at the Merivale Mall here in Ottawa to get it straightened by Gloria.
How are you straightening your hair weekly? With a flat iron? If so, I would stop and do some no-heat styles instead. I usually wash and put my hair in a bun. While most of my pics are me with my hair down, I almost always where my hair up. I’ve been going heat-free for a while now and the results are amazing. I also deep-condition like my life depends on it. Lol. Hope that helps!
xo,
Dom
My goal has been to never buy shampoo since I would prefer to go to a salon, but it is now my shedding season, and I have no idea what the best shampoo and cnditioners are these days? I have long hair with silver and grey threads. I love this chapter for my hair and am eager to embrace the change. I have signed up for your not and eager to hear about the best products. Thank you for doing this!!!
Hi I haven’t relaxed my hair in 4 years. I was wondering what is a good perm you use in your hair or would recommend to buy at a local beauty supply store?
Thank you for the advice!
Hello Dominique
My name is April, I too am Canadian I have been watching your videos, I always had a problem keeping my hair straight after relaxing it, now I know what I need to do. How to moisturize it and have it heathly like yours,I use to have my mother relax my hair , I think I will go to a professional from now on and just use your tips on how to care for it after. I want to thank you for your tutorials, I now know I can have the hair I truly want!🤗
Author
Hi April! Thank you so much for your kind words!! Do you feel your mom is overprocessing your hair or is the problem that you hair needs more moisture? Really glad you are finding my videos helpful!
Hello sweet Dominique, u can’t image how I feel anytime I watch your video on u tube. U’r amazing! Ur beauty hair n humility CANNOT be over emphasized. U are GREAT! I luv every video of yours, they r all eye opening. Tnx so so much for ur tym n passion to help especially ladies with d crown of glory issues, God bless u. May i know d relaxer n u use n d porosity of it hair. I wish I had this insight years back. I used to have very beautiful hair but started shedding in 2016. I have bald spots at my crown n my edges all gone. Iam trying to fix them. Taking hair growth gummies n wants to use Rogaine foam for female hair growth. I’m getting frustrated. Unfortunately in my part of d world, our dermatologists don’t really really give much attention to issues like this. They concentrate on skin diseases n stuff like that. I pray I get my hair back one in the near future.🤝🙏🏼🌹
I’ve had relaxed hair for over 40 years! But now I have several thin and bald spots. I go to a salon every two weeks Do you think it’s time to go natural? I was once diagnosed with alopecia.. then the new dermatologist I went to took a biopsy and said I’ve overly processed it and recommended I go natural and that was about 8 years ago .. any Suggestions is greatly appreciated!
I come from a family of long hair. Mine is long and very dark,but I noticed the the color is fading a bit.I don’t take good care of it I must admit.heip Donna
Thank you for this. It’s so difficult maintaining my hair by myself; each month it always gets to a point where I just have no idea what to do with it. And I can’t afford to go to a hair stylist and spend $80 plus monthly. So I always have to apply my own relaxers. I had to do a complete chop in college and since then I’ve been terrified of damaging my hair to that point again. I don’t know if I’ll be able to successful follow all your tips but I hope so! Thank you for taking the time! So few people care enough about our hair and even more (especially now) refuse to acknowledge how some of us do prefer to have relaxers versus wearing a natural style. So thank you, for seeing me and saying that it’s ok!
Hello Dominique..I’m 2weeks old since I relaxed my hair…I didn’t have any Info.about washing it regularly…my question is..after washing…and deep condition..what next?how will am I going to survive with the washed hair coz I tend to think hair will shrink and back to kinky
I know it’s an old post . I’ve just started following you and taken your advises. Just the trimmings and the conditioning weekly has stop the shedding . I was shedding a lot and now I see nothing on the comb when I comb my hair .